You knew exactly what you had, you just never thought they would leave

There’s this quote I always read that says, “You never know what you have until it’s gone”. Then there is another quote that says, “You knew exactly what you had, you just never thought they would leave”.

That second quote, is accurate on SO many levels, specially when you are in a relationship. When you are with someone, there are things you do that bother them. Of course, there will be things that they do that bother you as well. Now, some people do not tell their partner what bothers them but you can tell when they don’t like something you do.

Once you know that specific actions bother the person you love, you should change them, or adjust them. A person should not be the only reason for your change, but if it is something you can live without, then why not. Show the person that you care about what they think and how they feel, and make a difference. Your person should have a good reason though on why they are getting bothered by your actions.

I have changed a lot throughout the years. Everyone changes even when they don’t realize it. I’ve made a lot of alterations, you can say, to my life, to my friends, to my points of view, and to myself. everything that changed was because I wanted to change it. However, some things were derived by other people.

I changed a bunch of stuff in my life for the man I love. Somethings I wish I changed earlier in my relationship, so he could feel how much I actually cared about his perspective and his opinion, instead of me just saying I do.

Now people may say that who ever wants to be with you has to accept everything about you as a whole and not want you to change. That, in my opinion is wrong. There will always be things that bother you about the person you love. They won’t force you to change, but out of respect and love, you will change.

If you keep repeating an action that your partner does not like they will eventually get up and leave. You cannot just expect them to wake up one day and decide something that bothers them is okay. When they actually leave you are going to regret not stopping some bad habit for them, or not adjusting an action for them.

Somethings in your life may be normal to you, but not normal to them, and vise versa. Somethings could be very normal to your partner, but to you it is not acceptable whatsoever. That is why compromise, and change is needed in all relationships. You will never meet someone who is exactly the way you always wanted. With the characteristics, and personality you have dreamed of. Great relationships aren’t great because your partner is perfect, they are great because you and your partner work together to keep each other happy. You both respect each others thoughts and opinions and you compromise to make sure that no one is hurting the other.

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5 thoughts on “You knew exactly what you had, you just never thought they would leave

  1. I think change has many conflicting views as you quite rightly point out. I like to look at it as melting into the person you are with. Learning about how they are and how they relate to you. Giving your all to the moments and breathing in their experiences. Beautiful piece 🙂

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