I Just Want To Leave

Contemplating whether I should be a responsible adult and stay in my job, or whether I should quit what I do, leave where I was born and raised, and just try to start a life where I would rather be.

It is not easy immigrating to a new country especially when you do not already have a job offer there, but I feel like it would all be worth the struggle.

Then again, wouldn’t I be considered a horrible daughter just leaving my parents behind when they want me with them?

All these Arabs ways of life and expectations; how I wish I could rip them away from me. All these Arab “traditions” and “customs”, how I wish I could tell my parents I do not care about all of them. I do not care about what is expected from an Arab female and what is inappropriate for an Arab female to do.

I dream of the day that I pack my bags and never look back on this place.

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5 thoughts on “I Just Want To Leave

  1. I can relate to this so much as I’m in a similar dilemma. With how things are going right now in my life, I’m planning to leave. It might be different for you – but as Einstein said, “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” You already know what it would be like if you stayed – you probably lived that life over and over again in your mind – what’s the unknown is what would happen if you go. It’s scary. But there’s truth and beauty to it. And in my opinion, always have the courage to explore what the heart really wants. For every beat is a chance for you to realize some feat no other can help you with. Realize you.

    • First of, I love your url name. Sounds like the title of my life. I agree with you, the beauty of leaving is in the mixed emotions of excitment and scaredness you get. I really wish I could leave but it is so hard to explain this to my parents. They are very traditional parents. They do not understand how a girl my age could be unhappy or depressed. They think I’m a “rebel” or “ungreatful”, but like you said, I want to realize myself. I want to explore and move beyond what I ever imagined.

      I hope you get to move and follow your hearts desire. I hope I get to do so too.

      Thank you so much for your comment. It really made my heart warm.

      Regards,
      Nadine

      • Thank you Nadine. I feel like your story and my story are becoming more common, regardless of geographical location. Young people unsatisfied with the status quo, the 9-5 until 65.

        I mean, I think by this point, it’s clear – people want ‘more’ in life, but not necessarily more material possessions or ‘stuff’.

        People have labeled this as ‘quarter life crisis’, this agitation of not knowing which fork in the road to follow, especially now there are more options than ever, but at the same time, more worries than ever. We fear taking chances because what we might miss out on and vice versa and like you said, traditional values vs. following our heart, taking the road less traveled.

        I hope we both end up doing what makes us happy! You’re welcome. I found that I really enjoy reading your blog so, definitely hoping to read more in the future. Let’s keep in touch!

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