I envy the house you call your home;
I envy the bed covers that wrap around you as you sleep;
I envy the cup of coffee that gets to kiss you awake;
I envy the cigarette you are addicted to…
I want to be your home;
I want to wrap myself around you as you sleep;
I want to kiss you awake every morning for the rest of our lives;
And I want to be your addiction, as you are mine…
Yesterday I realized I have been holding so much hate in my heart towards one person, from my past, that it has been restricting me from giving my all in my life today. I hold pain, anger and broken pieces that cannot be fixed.
Holding these hatred feelings have been like venom in my veins, poisoning me and I didn’t know. I have to let go, I have to forgive your actions, and the agony you placed on me, but not for you. I have to forgive your actions for myself. Once I release this anger, I will be able to give more in my daily life, to someone that deserves it.
Then I thought, maybe those pieces, my broken pieces are not suppose to be fixed. Maybe they are suppose to be replaced. Replaced by someone who can make me whole without noticing. Someone who will heal me, when they do not even realize I am broken.
Skeletons in our closet, we all have.
Things in the past, we regret we did.
If only we could erase them from our memories,
And the memories of those who were a part of it.
We move on, that’s true.
We forgive ourselves,
And live our lives a day at a time.
But then one day it all comes soaring down.
All the things you regret,
All the hurt you hid away,
It all comes crashing on your day.
You feel so broken,
So hurt inside,
How I wish,
I could erase it from my mind.