Lebanon, piece of heaven

Source: http://wallpas.com/lebanon-flag-grunge.html

Many poets have written for you,
Many voices have sung for you,
Many people have died for you,
And many families long to return to you.

Lebanon, a piece of heaven on earth, they say,
How I wish I knew you in a better way.
For my blood and roots belong to you,
Yet my childhood on your land does not exist.

I come to you as a visitor,
My beloved home land.
I come to you as an outsider,
Because that is where I stand.

Politics and greedy leaders,
Have torn you apart.
Due to those troubles,
Our parents and their parents, left the struggle,
In hope for one day to return to your heart.

At 21, I stand lost in your beauty that I see on the screens,
At 21, I stand lost in the smiles of my family I see in pictures, that I didn’t grow near,
At 21, I stand lost in the country I should know everything about,
At 21, I stand lost, because I know nothing about the land where my roots come from.

Lebanon, a piece of heaven on earth, they say,
I await the day, on your soil, I will kneel and pray.
For I will be home, on the land I belong,
Even if just for a visit,
Even if just for a day,
I will get to say, “I’m home today”..

Source: http://agbuyp.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/agbu-yp-Lebanon.jpg

Source: http://www.skiinglebanon.com/files/2010/07/lebanon22.jpg

High School Sweetheart

I took a deep breath and submitted,
After four long years I finally admitted,
I want to see him.

I want to see him see me,
That was the key.
Will he look me in the eye?
Or will he walk right past me?

All this time I wanted to give in,
To pick up the phone,
Would he answer when he saw me ringing?

Now that I know he’s back in town,
Should I reach out,
Or would I look like a clown?

Making a move after all these years,
Just to see if a part of his heart still beats for me.

Just to see how I would feel when I looked in his eyes,
Would I melt to the core?
I wouldn’t be surprised.

But maybe this time my heart and my mind will agree,
That there is no place for him inside of me.
That his presence won’t make me feel weak,
And his voice won’t be anymore unique.

The walls of this house …

The walls of this house have all my joys,
All my happiness,
All my celebrations.

The walls of this house have all my sadness,
All my screams,
All my tears.

The walls of this house have all my loving,
The man who kept coming,
The kisses and hugs I kept giving.

The walls of this house have all my stories,
The funny ones,
And the thrillers.

The walls of this house have all my darkness,
All my fears,
All my Loneliness.

The walls of this house have all my broken dreams,
The what I could have been,
The what I should have done.

The walls of this house hold my pieces together,
And the day has come,
When this house has turned into rubble,
Just like me. . .

Song of the month for me

I heard this song on the radio and ever since I cannot stop listening to it. Ed Sheeran sings Thinking Out Loud incredibly!! The words are amazing, and when I am alone I sing along at the top of my lungs. So much emotion in it, it’s my new obsession. It’s one of those love songs that are very catchy, and not too mushy or cheesy.

Need a new song to check out : Ed Sheeran – Thinking Out Loud

Let me know what you think! 🙂

Your voice is my strength

Suddenly one day, out of the blues I realized, your voice is the only voice that can calm me down. Your voice is the only voice that can truly put a smile on my face.

As I get depressed from different issues in my life I begin to isolate myself from friends and family. Other than my work colleagues (because I have to see them every morning), I avoid everyone once I get home. I lock myself in my room with a book and just disappear.

I try changing my mood myself. I turn some music on, but then that leads to sad music that puts me down even more. I turn on the TV but then you have all these romantic movies or happy family movies on every channel that make you feel worse.

Friends text me, and I avoid their messages as if I don’t have my phone with me. If I had to reply then I would lie saying I’m busy with work, or with the family, just because I don’t feel like putting on proper clothes and leaving the front door.

In the middle of all this isolation, I get a text from you and I can’t help but reply right that instance. You of course can tell when something is wrong even if I try to hide it through the letters of my words.

Even when I don’t want to hear my voice, I will talk for hours if it means I get to talk to you. On the phone, your voice smothers me with love and care. I feel more relaxed and free just by the sound of your laugh, or the funny noises you make to get me giggling. You can tell when I’m breaking down, and if I have cried that day just by the way I sound. No one can notice that like you. With me throwing random words out and not making sense at all, you still perfectly understand what I am trying to say.

That moment, that pure moment I realized, your voice is my strength. That specific moment I realized if it wasn’t for your voice and your care I would be at rock bottom not wanting to move or feel better.

Your voice gives me a reason to, smile and work hard. It gives me a reason to believe in a brighter future. That alone helps me get back up on my feet and gives me something to fight for when the whole world is crashing down on me.

I need to

I need to travel;
I need to get away;
I need to change scenery;
I need to breathe;
I need to see the sky somewhere else;
I need to go on vacation;
I need to go far away;
I need to disapear;
I need to smell different air;
I need to immigrate;
I’m going to break down.

Nominated for One Lovely Blog Award

I was nominated for the One Lovely Blog Award by The Platonic Scientist. I found his blog sometime last week, and I loved his writing. He knows how to grab your attention with his words and descriptions. Check his blog out and I’m sure you will not be disappointed. Thank you so much for the nomination!

Here are the rules for winning this award :

1. Thank the person who has nominated you. Provide a link to his/her blog.

2. List the rules and display the award image.

3. Include 7 facts about yourself.

4. Nominate 15 other bloggers and let them know that they have been nominated. This is a way to introduce others to bloggers that you love.

5. Display the award logo and follow the blogger who nominated you.

Here goes the seven facts about me:

1) I’m a very loud person, and really friendly.
2) I love reading, and writing.
3) I left pieces of my heart at every country, and at every state I’ve been too.
4) I save money just to travel the world.
5) I enjoy sitting alone in my room.
6) I love speaking in front of crowds of people. I enjoy being the master of ceremony at different events.
7) I am still discovering myself.

The blogs I nominate are:

1. Coco J. Ginger
2. Global Unison
3. Wanderingthemap94
4. Of Loving and Living
5. Kelzbelzphotography
6. Ramblingpoetry
7. Feet From Shore
8. K Beezy Is Viral

One-Liner Wednesday

Just because I’m thankful, doesn’t mean I am happy.

You knew exactly what you had, you just never thought they would leave

There’s this quote I always read that says, “You never know what you have until it’s gone”. Then there is another quote that says, “You knew exactly what you had, you just never thought they would leave”.

That second quote, is accurate on SO many levels, specially when you are in a relationship. When you are with someone, there are things you do that bother them. Of course, there will be things that they do that bother you as well. Now, some people do not tell their partner what bothers them but you can tell when they don’t like something you do.

Once you know that specific actions bother the person you love, you should change them, or adjust them. A person should not be the only reason for your change, but if it is something you can live without, then why not. Show the person that you care about what they think and how they feel, and make a difference. Your person should have a good reason though on why they are getting bothered by your actions.

I have changed a lot throughout the years. Everyone changes even when they don’t realize it. I’ve made a lot of alterations, you can say, to my life, to my friends, to my points of view, and to myself. everything that changed was because I wanted to change it. However, some things were derived by other people.

I changed a bunch of stuff in my life for the man I love. Somethings I wish I changed earlier in my relationship, so he could feel how much I actually cared about his perspective and his opinion, instead of me just saying I do.

Now people may say that who ever wants to be with you has to accept everything about you as a whole and not want you to change. That, in my opinion is wrong. There will always be things that bother you about the person you love. They won’t force you to change, but out of respect and love, you will change.

If you keep repeating an action that your partner does not like they will eventually get up and leave. You cannot just expect them to wake up one day and decide something that bothers them is okay. When they actually leave you are going to regret not stopping some bad habit for them, or not adjusting an action for them.

Somethings in your life may be normal to you, but not normal to them, and vise versa. Somethings could be very normal to your partner, but to you it is not acceptable whatsoever. That is why compromise, and change is needed in all relationships. You will never meet someone who is exactly the way you always wanted. With the characteristics, and personality you have dreamed of. Great relationships aren’t great because your partner is perfect, they are great because you and your partner work together to keep each other happy. You both respect each others thoughts and opinions and you compromise to make sure that no one is hurting the other.

Move on in life

Once I’m done with my job at the end of January, I will be ready to move. I don’t know if I will be able too, but my mind and soul will be ready to pack up and desert this country I call home.

I have outgrown this country and its people. This isn’t the place I want to be, and that is a fact. This isn’t the culture I want to live in anymore, and I do not want to restrict my life anymore.
I am ready to spread my wings and go anywhere I can. Whether it is a country to finish my education, or a country to work in, I will be ready to start fresh. To start a new chapter in my life.

Maybe I’ll move back to America, or maybe I’ll go somewhere I’ve never been like Jordan, or London, I’m not sure. This time, I’m not thinking of anyone. This time, I’m not going to consider how far I am going to be from friends or family, because the further I go, the happier I will be.

I want to be on my own. Maybe that is a horrible choice, and I will hate it, but at least I would have experienced something that has been my wish to try.